He and I Want Different Things

Dear Courage,

What do you do if you want different things out of life?

I want to travel! I’d love to go new places, meet new people, experience new things. I feel like I’ll just shrivel up and disappear if I stay in one place the rest of my life.

My DH is an introvert. He shies away from crowds. He hates to travel. He’s contented in his job and doesn’t ever want to move.

I love him… but I’m dying inside. What can I do?


Dear Stagnating,

Relationships are all about communication and compromise. You and your DH need to talk about this, but put some thought into this first and see what you are willing to commit to.

Maybe he will be okay with you doing some traveling alone – especially if you go with a group of girlfriends or a travel group, so he won’t worry about your safety. And maybe he will be willing to do a few short trips with you, to places that aren’t as crowded. For instance, Las Vegas is crazy. It’s crowded, and noisy, and can be frightening to an introvert. So maybe you go on a tour of Las Vegas with a group.

upperfallsHowever, some places are not so packed. I don’t know what you’re interested in seeing, but My DH and I went to Tahquamenon Falls in Upper Michigan. There were less than ten people in the whole state forest! It was beautiful, too. 50,000 gallons of water falling per second – it’s impressive!

Find out what your DH would really like to do. What are his desires – and commit to doing them with him. Maybe he just wants to grill out in the back yard and have one or two neighbors over. Maybe that’s about as interesting to you as watching paint dry, but if he’ll do some traveling with you, you should return the favor and try to enjoy something he’s interested in.

Good luck, and I hope you get to see some interesting sights this year!



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